Who can judge her?

Because she decided to live her life. Without feeling down, depressed, ill. Perhaps the thought of having someone around her bed of hospital, doing everything to please her, or everything that she needs, never passed through her mind.  We don’t even know if she likes this scene.

She can’t stand up and walk alone till the end of the runway. Can you blame her? What would you have done, on her place. We don’t know what exactly he (the doctor) said, neither what exactly she heard. Will you still judge her?

It must be painful enough to see that pity look from people to her, all the time. To have people trying to please her on her last minutes – we don’t even know when it will be.

Perhaps she decided not to live those last minutes in a bed, on her house, trying not to throw up because of the medicines. Perhaps she decided to walk till the end of the runway all by herself. And she did. We don’t know if the medicines would allow her to do it, and wouldn’t lead her to the same bed of hospital, with the same people trying to please her, and the same pity look on her way.

It is sad to see her there, trying to find a piece of air, to put it into her, without feeling tired because of it. It’s sad the look on her face. But she doesn’t regret. Because she lived her last days the way she chose.

And my question remains:

Who can judge her?

Until I fall asleep

Sing a song to me
tonight, my dear.
Until I fall asleep
please, take away my fears.

I want to feel the peace
like I used to.
Sing a song to me,
is all I ask of you.

The sound of your voice
in this lullaby.
Even ocean calms down
while you're passing by.

Sing a song to me
is all I ask of you.
Calm the ocean in me
Until I fall asleep

Make the gray comes blue.
Turn one into two.
With a lullaby
Like you used to.

Unspoken words

What else do you want me to say?
Haven't I spoken everything?
Didn't you understand what I meant?
How can I make it more obvious?

Everything you heard came from me.
And everything was from my deep.
I really wanted to say those words.
I really wanted you to hear it.

But, please, don't ask me to repeat.
And the reason I wouldn't repeat
is not because it hurts.
I just can't remember what I said.

Yours.

There are sometimes when we don't know what to do!
We just have to stop and think about the better option. But it's an impossible thing to be done. So you ask some people about what they would do, in your place. Nothing they say can really help you, because everything depends on you. You have to take this decision and that's all.
Your mom cannot decide for you anymore, nor your dad. Everybody will be selfish and you should be too. 'Cause you'll suffer the consequences all by yourself.

Like I said, no matter what I say here. Everything is on your hands. And you have to decide. Well, that's your life, man. Not mine, not your parents'.
Yours.

Letters

Write me, buddy.
But write me soon!

Teddy bear

Well, I'm here.

Just on my bed.

Looking to the window.

At nothing.

I'm here.

Waiting for you.

For the moment that you're gonna enter the room and make me happy.

Like a teddy bear,

I'm just here. With the same face I use every single day.

Wondering, if I'm the first or the last in your friends list.

Or even if I'm at it!

And I stay here.

I spend my day doing nothing!

With the pleasure of waiting.

I'm here.

I already know it.

But I don't think you do.

How can I stand it?

I don't know.

Maybe hope is the answer!

I'd like to know

what would happen

if it becomes hopeless.

But while the hope still survives

I still get hurt.

Me, your teddy bear.

Who you were supposed to care!

You can say I forgot that teddy bear is not real.

But you forgot that I am.

And you couldn't do it.

Never!

Maybe, I'm wrong.

Because, above all, I prefer being your teddy bear.

Wait for you at night.

Look to the window. At nothing.

Spend days doing nothing.

And use the same face every day!

But I implore,

like your teddy bear

give me a hug.

It's everything I need!

From my deep heart

Sometimes, I think about my life. Am I happy? Is everything making me happy? Am I making myself happy? I could leave and get away from it. I could back to who I do know. I could look for something that wouldn't make me so tired, but happy.
Maybe, I'm losing what I was supposed to win. In my present I guess how the future will look like. If, in the future, everything was perfect. That's (what is happenning) is everything that I looked for. I knew that would be easy. But it's not, I was wrong. But it's not a mistake.
I know God loves me. And if it was worse to me, God wouldn't let me come. So, I'm here. That's the best way. That's what my God says to me. I gotta believe. I have to. I know I'll cry at night, but no one will see me but God. I know my tears will be dryed by my laughs, when my turn to forget arrives.
I believe that there is only one who I can trust. But there are a lot of people that live in my heart and all of these people will wait me a half, one, two, five years. I just can't be late, maybe late brings death. If it happens, I will look back and say "I can't believe that I didn't enjoy them". I'm so young. I'm so old. I'm young and old enough to decide.
Now, I can't stand. I wish I could get away with it, but I can't. I don't want to give up. I wouldn't be shame if I did, but I don't. I'm just trying to say that is difficult to say goodbye, even on telephone. But worse is not say hello, even in dreams.

Oh! Big River

Oh! Big River
Oh, don't you cry for me.
I come from Minas Gerais!
With my cheese on my knee! ♫